Every semester, before all students register for classes, they have to get their courselist approved by their faculty advisor (not anymore for me!). Sheldon (painting professor) often sends out emails to remind his advisees to come and do this early and not wait until the last minute, but the closing words of this term's email were just too priceless not to post.
"....Lastly, I will not be available during registration week (April 26 – 30), due to a heavy schedule. Don’t procrastinate. If you do, you’ll not get into your courses, miss out on finishing your degree, disappoint your family, ruin your career, be forced into menial disgusting jobs for low pay, and completely fail to attract a desirable mate. So choose those courses now!
Your companion in virtue and industry,
Ah, Sheldon, I will miss your awesomeness ^_^